Conversations with Claus Vol.4 – Christmas Fanatic

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Welcome to another Conversation with Claus, a Skype session with Santa Claus in which he provides invaluable advice and wisdom to callers about celebrating the holidays. This month, Santa addresses the Christmas concerns of Frank Furter from Fullerton.

Frank is a Christmas fanatic who wants to make the holidays absolutely perfect for his family and customers. Now that summer is winding down, he’s feeling the pressure of the rapidly approaching holiday season. Can Santa help to ease his worried mind?

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Hi Santa. How ya doin’?
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I’m well, Frank. Starting to get a bit hectic at work with you-know-what just around the corner. How about you?
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That’s exactly what I want to talk to you about. I’m kind of in a tizzy here. My stomach is in knots from just thinking about holiday decorating!
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There, there, Frank. Calm down and tell Santa all about it.
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It’s just that there’s so much to do! And I have so many ideas! I was thinking this year, maybe the neighbors and I could all string our houses together with a common theme and make it the best-decorated street in the city!
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Sounds like a great idea….
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But that’s just the beginning! I also want to make my business look great for my customers. And I have so many questions! What bulb sizes and colors should I use? Should I try the new LED lights? Maybe hang some garland? How should I light my palm trees? And what about lawn decor like a sleigh and reindeer? It’s all so overwhelming. It’s making me a nervous wreck!!
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Frank, you need to take a chill pill, dude.
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Do I need a special prescription for that?
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No, just follow my instructions. First, take a deep breath.
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But I don’t have time for a deep breath! How about a shallow one?
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A deep one, Frank. We need to get you settled down a bit.
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Okay, here I go. Breathe in… and blow out.
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Good, good, Frank. Now I want you to try a soothing mantra. Repeat after me slowly. Moeee…
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Moeee…
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Buh looom…
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Buh looom…
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Inaaae…
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Inaaae…
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Shunnn…
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Shunnn…
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Very good. Now repeat those words in a soothing chant and gradually put them all together.
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Moeee… Buh loom… Inaaae… Shun. MoeeeBuhloomInnaaaeShun… Mobile Illumination!
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Congratulations Frank! You’ve found the answer to all of your most troubling questions. Just one call to Mobile Illumination and they’ll create the perfect design for both your home and your business. Their experienced technicians will get it installed right, then maintain and service it all season long, and even take it all down and store it when the holidays are over. Just sit back and relax and let Mobile Illumination take care of all the details. If you sign up soon, you can even get a free Christmas tree! Mobile Illumination can help you achieve the inner peace and contentment you seek.
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Thanks Swami, er, I mean, Santa. I feel so much better now! By the way, how did you become so good at counseling people with their problems?
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Well, in addition to majoring in Mirth-Making at Santa School, I also completed a minor in Psychology.
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Tune in next month for another Conversation with Claus. And in the meantime, give Mobile Illumination a call to take care of all your holiday decorating needs!